Me: I was in the winter of my life…and the men I met along the road were my only summer. At night I fell asleep with visions of myself dancing and laughing and crying with them. Three years down the line of being on an endless world tour and my memories of them were the only things that sustained me…and my only real happy times. I was a singer…not a very popular one; I once had dreams of becoming a beautiful poet. But a plan and a series of events saw those dreams dash and divide like a million stars in the night sky, that I wished on over and over again, sparkling and broken. But I didn’t really mind it because I knew that it takes getting everything you ever wanted and then losing it, to know what true freedom is. And when the people I used to know found out what I’d been doing, how I’d been living…they asked me why, but there’s no use in talking to people who have a home. They have no idea what it’s like to seek safety in other people…for a home to be wherever you lie your head. I was always an unusual girl. My mother told me I had a chameleon soul, no moral compass pointing due north, no fixed personality. Just a hint of indecisiveness that was just as wide and wavering as the ocean. And if I said I didn’t plan for it to turn out this way, I’d be lying…because I was born to be the other woman. I belonged to no one, who belonged to everyone. Who had nothing, who wanted everything. With a fire for every experience, and an obsession for freedom, that terrified me to the point that I couldn’t even talk about it. And pushed me to a nomadic point of madness that both dazzled and dizzied me.
Oh god ok so anything by Murakami AHH specifically 1Q84 but I’ve recently read some of his more obscure work and fuuuuck just everything I’ve ever dreamed of and more. Also golden’s memoirs of a geisha!!! Read it first when I was like 12 and it totally changed my life srs and and and how I live now by meg rosoff that was a belter another one I read in my early teens and yeah the recent film adaptation was shit though. Also eugenides’ virgin suicides, thackeray’s vanity fair, the millennium trilogy by larsson. !!!!! Fav movies incl stoker, drive, cloud atlas, v for vendetta, factory girl, Tristan + Isolde, candy…. Idk idk! Also can’t justify why I like any of these rn hahaha I’m in transit and waiting to board another 12 hour flight in Dubai airport ah lyf xx